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Happy Birthday to me, today I am 45 years young and I really don’t consider out of my late 30’s. I never work on my birthday, I made the mistake of doing that last year after many years of taking it as holiday and I didn’t like it. So today I have been painting my day away, watching good tv and chilling out, and it has been a pleasant day.

My whole ethos for this year is Harmony which just in the first 2 weeks has been a real challenge, so I have taken small steps one journal page a week, gentle exercise every day that I can improve upon as the days and weeks go by instead of trying too hard at the beginning, failing and giving up.

So my first completed journal page is below, and it is sometime how I feel that is it raining life, everything coming down on me all at once. Mostly this tends to be work and as much as I try to let it go when you are there over 8 hours a day it is extremely hard.

Raining Life

Really enjoyed using my new Dylusions paints, lovely consistency and go beautifully with the distress paints and sprays. I just love the depth of colour that can be achieved through layering these products, with this in mind I thought I would have a go at painting some clay butterflies I made for my white tree.

White Tree 1

This is just the start and these were the only ones I had ready to paint, I like the look bright and sunny.

Pink Butterfly

Yellow Butterfly

Orange Butterfly

Green Butterfly

And I have started a new journal page  for this week, just loving the colours so rich

New Inspiration

So from doing no art to a fair amount over the last couple of weeks it feels really good to get back into my life again, get some work life balance.

Wishing you a great evening.

Clairester xx

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The end of the first week of January, I wonder how many people have already broken their New Year resolutions, i don’t set any for that very reason. Instead this year I have thought about changes I want to make and instead of leaping in, I will take small step towards making them happen.

My year is all about Harmony, so I want to be fitter, stronger physically and mentally, better work life balance and I want to focus much more on making art and being creative. This all takes effort in todays society that is all about stress, work and making money.

So my plan involves me starting gentle daily exercise, being consistent which is totally achievable. I will be working on the same schedule for 4 weeks then gradually increasing the exercise time along with this I will be eating healthier clean foods and cutting out processed foods, the idea being to create a habit of exercising and good eating. Obviously I will be allowing myself to have a little of what I like cake/ sweet but where possible homemade without additives.

The other part of having balance is making sure that I take time out to be creative, I have really missed the act of putting paint to paper and seeing what I can create. Below is what I am currently working on in my new handmade journal, and I am really liking how it is coming on.

Journal Page 1Journal Page 10 Jan

I will post pictures of the finished article later in the week, and I am just loving the feeling I get from playing around with paint.

Enjoy your Sunday evening

Much love

Clairester xx

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Hello and Happy New Year to you all!

I am extremely glad to see the back of 2015, it was not the greatest year for me a horrible breakup, 2 bouts of redundancy that I survived but have had to deal with the fallout, lots of stress from the additional work and being ill all over Christmas and New Year.

So welcome to 2016 my year to make decisions, work towards making some changes and have some amazing adventures. Being ill has given me a chance to think and reflect over what changes I want to make now I can start to make some plans.

Part of reflecting on 2015 to move towards the new year was to work on choosing my word courtesy of Susannah Conway, her short free course for Finding your Word was invaluable. I didn’t have one for 2015 so felt it was important to have a focus for 2016, Susannah’s course was insightful and everyone in the Facebook group was incredibly supportive; it was wonderful to see each person go through the process and pick their word.

My New Year was spent making a new art journal, I did this in 2014 and being ill I certainly was not planning on going out. It is really quite therapeutic and at the end of the process you have a new journal.

New Journal & Supplies

So this is the cover before I added the name and with some of the art supplies I ordered over Christmas. Sadly 2015 was not good for art productivity and I have really missed this. Just by painting the cover I remembered how much I loved this which is part of my wider plan for this year.

2016 Harmony Art Journal

The word I chose for 2016 is Harmony.

My life got a little out of control and I lost perspective, I took on too much and found I had no work life balance at all. What I have realised is that I have to be able to walk away from work and not to feel guilty, it is not my responsibility to cover all the work no-one else can do . My use of the work Harmony is to remind myself that I need balance in all aspects of my life, I did not live last year I survived. This year is about me shouting out loud that I AM ALIVE and working on making adventures happen.

So no resolutions for me instead my word serves me for the whole of 2016 in all the ways I want to make changes, I am looking for Harmony.

I wish much success with your plans for 2016, lets share our adventures.

Much love

Clairester xx

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And I liked it alot.

Been an age since I last blogged, sadly the work/ life balance just became work, no life really in the 2 weeks leading up to Easter early mornings and late nights. I hate that it is really hard to create when I am so worn out or have no energy.

Luckily I have this week off so apart from catching up with chores I am painting up a storm and it feels good, I have really missed the creative outlet as I know how much it settles my mind, takes away anxiety and nurtures my soul. As you are already aware I paint from my heart, what I feel at that moment which is why I tend to do them quickly otherwise when the feeling dissipates it is a struggle to finish. With that in mind thus feeling has lasted several days so thus us what I created.

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So yes this is quite different for me, well at the beginning of April I got an offer for online dating so I decided to give it a go for a month. I wrote a honest bio for the first time and within a few days start chatting to a lovely guy. The emails were interesting about who he is, asking me about stuff in my bio and he was funny. Naturally it then progressed to talking on the phone, oh my so much laughter and we talked about everything. So last week he says we should meet, which for me is the hardest part I don’t consider myself attractive so it tends to be make or break.

Saturday was the date, we spent just short of 8 hours together which I think is long for a date, and it was the perfect day. Now I have never really dated, fallen into relationships, met odd men but never treated the way i was on Saturday. We got on really well, it was just easy as he was so kind and caring, by the end we were holding hands and he was very much the gentleman. Since then he has been sweet and honest, my normal reaction is to question, get anxious and control and instead I am going with the flow allowing myself to feel this way and enjoying how this feels.

Personality wise we fit, silences (if any) are reflective and calming, he is crazy handsome and a lot of fun and it all right now, in this moment feels right. I think dating when you are older (40’s) means you have a better perspective on what doesn’t work for you making it easier to spot what does. I am well aware that things change, as do feelings but I am trying to be the artistic, happy clever me not the one filled with anxiety who doubts everything ruins it then say I’ll never find anyone.

As a rule this doesn’t happen to me so I am happy to join this ride for as long as it makes me happy and our second date is tomorrow. Nice little line of anxiety going tonight that he will see me a second time and change his mind, totally irrational of course and if that did happen then he is not worth it, this I know….doesn’t help!

Anyway goodnight to you all

Clairester
Xx

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Selfie Art

I have never been particularly photogenic, there is a gap in photo’s when I was growing up where I refused to be in them. Now we are the culture of taking photos and taking ones of ourselves, out and about, no make up (God forbid) and worse!!

So I tried today, sun was out and well this is what I got, I guess I am biased because I hate photo’s of myself and tend to use the same couple over and over. I haven’t photo shopped them, so this is me in all my glory.

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You may ask why take a photo of yourself if you will always be critical of how you look well if I wanted to date online this is kinda required, so it is about getting used to how I look.  Yes I look in the mirror, I style my hair, put make up on but I really don’t know what I look like, I only know who I am inside, what I think and feel and to be judged on my appearance feels unnerving. Yes I could try the old fashioned way which is what in today’s society meet someone in a club not when I am in my 40’s.

I haven’t decided to go all out but I will later this year when I am felling better about life. I think where I have felt unwell, gotten run down and having hay fever has left me unhappy, miserable and unattractive. So for now I am looking after me, working on my art and doing lots of reading because right now I feel trapped in my life, I am not living the life I want but I am unsure how to get there so I am starting slowly to work out what I want and how to get it.

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So that is me today, who knows how I will feel in a couple of days.

Clairester
Xx

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Beautiful Day, mainly due to me sleeping in and having a lazy day, no work what utter bliss. My plan was some art this morning then gentle walk and shopping this afternoon and a little art tonight.

So shopping a few bargains from the charity shop, seriously the lace making was £2.00 how could I not, it seems to be book month this is my 5th that I have purchased, then 2 pretty plates.

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I am terrible when it comes to a bargain, I will be doing more of this later in the week……oops.

Bit of a chillier day and I really did not dress appropriately, as you can see no Sun!

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And just as I sat down to have a snack these 2 sat in the water loitering waiting to see if I had anything good.

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So good to be outside and at least it is dry if nothing else opens up so many more possibilities, I tend to find I get more creative the later it is so I am looking forward to the lighter nights. I am working on one new painting which is almost done just need to add words and embellishments.

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Then also finishing one of my “projects” from earlier, I have a lot of these, this is still a work in progress.

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Along with all of this I had an idea of making some jewellery for myself, mainly because I cannot find anything I like but I do have beads, I like to challenge myself to the point where I never finish anything!!

Let us see what tomorrow brings.

Clairester
Xx

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To Finish or Not

Just a quick pop in, I have had a lovely couple if days been on a course for Management which was wonderfully interactive, a real joy.

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Even though it is cold I love the sunshine, and I really can’t wait for spring to have some warmer weather. I am still working on this painting and now it seems apt as we move into spring, now I need some I inspiration to finish it. I have to say that I am terrible at starting paintings and not finishing them so gradually I pick a new painting and attempt go finish it.

And yet I have already started a new painting in my quest to sell my artwork obviously I have to finish them first. I have a goal of April to post some art into my Etsy shop, I have to take that leap and just go for it otherwise I will never do it.

I have next week as holiday so I am looking forward to some serious art time, who h I feel really quite excited about.

For now I will ponder my next move on my painting.

Happy & Dreaming

Clairester
Xx

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